{"id":1845,"date":"2013-06-02T13:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-06-02T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.silutesnaujienos.lt\/lt\/pasiklyde-pasauliai-suraskime-supraskime-vieni-kitus\/"},"modified":"2013-06-02T13:00:00","modified_gmt":"2013-06-02T15:00:00","slug":"pasiklyde-pasauliai-suraskime-supraskime-vieni-kitus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.silutesnaujienos.lt\/lt\/pasiklyde-pasauliai-suraskime-supraskime-vieni-kitus\/","title":{"rendered":"Pasiklyd\u0119 pasauliai. Suraskime, supraskime vieni kitus"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"family-6\"<\/a>Lai\u0161kai (1). Kada a\u0161 tave pame\u010diau?<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201eMan g\u0117da vestis savo vaik\u0105 \u012f parduotuv\u0119: visuomet u\u017esimano to, ko a\u0161 negaliu pirkti. Kiek jis gali bandyt mano kantryb\u0119 savo kaprizais?\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eNeturiu kantryb\u0117s \u017ei\u016br\u0117ti, kaip jis plauna indus, geriau jau i\u0161plaunu pati. Ar i\u0161au\u0161 pagaliau diena, kai jis i\u0161moks tai daryti tinkamai?\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eApmaudu, jog dirbu nuo ryto iki vakaro, kad gal\u0117\u010diau gardesn\u012f k\u0105sn\u012f vaikams nupirkti, o i\u0161 j\u0173 – jokio d\u0117kingumo!\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJau\u010diam\u0117s nusivyl\u0119, nes skiriame daug j\u0117g\u0173 vaiko aukl\u0117jimui, ir vis tiek – vis\u0173 vaikai, kaip vaikai, o su m\u016bsi\u0161kiu – am\u017einai kas nors ne taip…\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201ePavargau jam ai\u0161kinti tuos pa\u010dius dalykus po de\u0161imt kart\u0173 – visi \u017eod\u017eiai kaip \u012f sien\u0105 \u017eirniai… Tegird\u017eiu tik: Aha. Tuoj. Gerai. Paskui.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eGalva ply\u0161ta nuo nuolatini\u0173 vaik\u0173 pe\u0161tyni\u0173 ir rieten\u0173, kada jie pagaliau i\u0161moks ai\u0161kintis santykius gra\u017eiuoju?\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJau\u010diuosi bevilti\u0161kai, nes mano vaikas – jau \u0161e\u0161tokas, o a\u0161 vis dar turiu patikrinti, ar jis paruo\u0161\u0117 pamokas, ar visk\u0105 susid\u0117jo \u012f kuprin\u0119.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eUo\u0161viai \u012fkyr\u0117jo su savo ki\u0161imusi \u012f m\u016bs\u0173 gyvenim\u0105, vaikai i\u0161 j\u0173 gr\u012f\u017eta kaip laukiniai – i\u0161 proto gali i\u0161eit!\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eVisada sakau vaikui: kas beatsitikt\u0173, pirmiausia visada pasisakyk man. Tod\u0117l buvau tiesiog \u0161okiruota, kai apie tai, kad i\u0161 jo ty\u010diojasi mokykloje, papasakojo ne man, o kaimynei.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eDrebu d\u0117l kiekvieno aukl\u0117tojos skambu\u010dio – ko mano vaikas nepadar\u0117, k\u0105 padar\u0117 ne taip? Kur a\u0161 pra\u017ei\u016br\u0117jau, ko nei\u0161ai\u0161kinau? Kada jis pagaliau supras, kad privalo gerai mokytis ir elgtis.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eMan skaudu, kad jis valand\u0173 valandas ra\u0161in\u0117ja \u017einutes draugams, o mano pasi\u016blymo va\u017eiuoti su mumis \u012f gamt\u0105 tarsi negirdi.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eMane erzina, kad jis \u201esusitvarko\u201c kambar\u012f per kelias minutes, o su draugais apie visokius niekus gali plep\u0117ti i\u0161tisas valandas.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eMan labai neramu, kad jis toks u\u017esidar\u0119s savy. Ne\u012fmanoma n\u0117 \u017eod\u017eio i\u0161pe\u0161ti: gr\u012f\u017eta i\u0161 mokyklos, burbteli \u201eviskas gerai\u201c ir, \u012fsijung\u0119s televizori\u0173, u\u017esidaro savo kambaryje.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eLabai skaudu, kad m\u016bs\u0173 vaikai nejau\u010dia n\u0117 kruopelyt\u0117s d\u0117kingumo. Juk baltos dienos nematom, besipl\u0117\u0161ydami su darbais – kad tik jiems nieko netr\u016bkt\u0173.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eMan labai neramu d\u0117l jo ateities, nes jis nieko negali padaryti iki galo ir gerai. Nieko gero i\u0161 jo nebus.\u201c
\u201eKartais atrodo, kad jis yra surink\u0119s visas m\u016bs\u0173 gimin\u0117s ydas.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201ePasipiktinau mokytoja, kai pasi\u016bl\u0117 perskaityti knyg\u0105 apie vaik\u0173 aukl\u0117jim\u0105, lyg a\u0161 ir be knyg\u0173 to nesugeb\u0117\u010diau.\u201c<\/p>\n

Lai\u0161kai (2). Noriu, kad mane surastum<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201eJie nekreipia \u012f mane d\u0117mesio tol, kol nepasielgiu netinkamai.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie daug \u017eino, bet neturi kantryb\u0117s man\u0119s i\u0161mokyti.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie pamaitina mane, bet neturi laiko sus\u0117sti kartu prie piet\u0173 stalo.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie nori manimi did\u017eiuotis, bet negali pasl\u0117pti nusivylimo, kai man nesiseka.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie daug kalba, bet retai i\u0161klauso.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie nori, kad taikiai sugyven\u010diau su broliu ir sese, o patys pykstasi tarpusavyje.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie nori, kad a\u0161 grei\u010diau u\u017eaug\u010diau, bet elgiasi su manimi lyg su ma\u017eu.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie link\u0119 nurodin\u0117ti mums, kaip gyventi, o patys pyksta, kai jiems bando patarti j\u0173 t\u0117vai.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie piktinasi mano melu, bet n\u0117ra pasiruo\u0161\u0119 su\u017einoti ties\u0105.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie tikisi i\u0161 man\u0119s teising\u0173 sprendim\u0173, bet neleid\u017eia suklysti.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie nuperka man \u017eaisl\u0173, bet pamir\u0161ta su manimi pa\u017eaisti.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie pa\u017e\u012fsta laikrod\u012f, bet neturi laiko.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie va\u017ein\u0117ja greitomis ma\u0161inomis, bet niekur nesusp\u0117ja.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie paklausia, kaip man sek\u0117si mokykloje, bet yra pasireng\u0119 i\u0161girsti vienintel\u012f \u017eodel\u012f – \u201egerai\u201c.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie \u012fjungia televizori\u0173 u\u017euot pasek\u0119 man pasak\u0105.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie daug dirba, kad u\u017edirbt\u0173 pinig\u0173, o a\u0161 galvoju; jei man\u0119s neb\u016bt\u0173, gal jiems b\u016bt\u0173 lengviau?\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie nori, kad a\u0161 u\u017eaug\u010diau geru \u017emogumi, bet kasdien kartoja, kad esu nevyk\u0117lis, \u017eioplys ir tinginys.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie klausia \u201e\u012f k\u0105 tu atsigimei?\u201c, tarsi nenor\u0117dami suprasti, kad be j\u0173 a\u0161 kit\u0173 pavyzd\u017ei\u0173 tiesiog neturiu.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJie ver\u010dia mane daryti nam\u0173 darbus, nors patys neskaito knyg\u0173. Jie liepia man mokytis, nors patys nesimoko.\u201c<\/p>\n

Lai\u0161kai (3). Ie\u0161kokime kartu<\/strong><\/p>\n

Vaiko at\u0117jimas \u012f \u0161\u012f pasaul\u012f – ne\u012fkainojama dovana ir sunkiai gr\u0105\u017einama skola. Prie\u0161ingai nei kitos dovanos, \u0161i netampa m\u016bs\u0173 nuosavybe. Tai dovanojimas galimyb\u0117s b\u016bti \u0161alia, dalintis d\u017eiaugsmais, steb\u0117ti sl\u0117pining\u0105 asmenyb\u0117s augim\u0105 – gyv\u0105 tro\u0161kim\u0105 pa\u017einti pasaul\u012f, nuo\u0161ird\u017ei\u0105 nuostab\u0105, naiv\u0173 tik\u0117jim\u0105, paprast\u0173 ir gili\u0173 gyvenimo ties\u0173 atradim\u0105, tyli\u0105 nuoskaud\u0105, gars\u0173 pagalbos \u0161auksm\u0105.<\/p>\n

Priimdami vaik\u0105 kaip dovan\u0105, pasira\u0161ome am\u017einos skolos veksel\u012f – \u012fsipareigojame vis\u0105 gyvenim\u0105 mok\u0117ti meile ir r\u016bpes\u010diu, atsidavimu ir atsakomybe, globa ir laisv\u0117s suteikimu, pagalba ir pasitik\u0117jimu.<\/p>\n

Vaiko at\u0117jimas \u012f pasaul\u012f – tai \u012fsidarbinimas pa\u010diame svarbiausiame ir sud\u0117tingiausiame darbe – buvimu t\u0117vais. \u0160io ypatingo darbo rezultatus sunku pamatuoti ir j\u0173 reikia ilgai laukti. Pravaik\u0161tos yra nedovanotinos ir skaud\u017eiai palie\u010dia atlyg\u012f.<\/p>\n

Atlygis – tai \u0161iltas vaiko apkabinimas, tai laimingos jo akys, pasitik\u0117jimo \u0161ypsena veide, \u017eengiant savaranki\u0161kus \u017eingsnius. Ir – kas nuneigs? – \u0161altinis, maitinantis t\u0117v\u0173 b\u016bt\u012f.<\/p>\n

Paskutiniu metu daug diskutuojama apie t\u0117v\u0173 darbo metodus – kiek tur\u0117t\u0173 b\u016bti laisv\u0117s ir apribojim\u0173, bausti ar nebausti, ber\u017ein\u0117 ko\u0161\u0117 – sveika ar \u017ealinga… Kar\u0161tose diskusijose skamba t\u0117v\u0173 baim\u0117 netekti autoriteto, visuomen\u0117s baim\u0117 likti be brand\u017ei\u0173 pilie\u010di\u0173, susipina teis\u0117s ir pareigos. Ta\u010diau lieka neatsakyti esminiai klausimai – kokia tur\u0117t\u0173 b\u016bti t\u0117v\u0173 meil\u0117? Kokios jos reikia vaikams? Aukl\u0117ti ir myl\u0117ti – ar tai suderinama?<\/p>\n

Kad aukl\u0117jimas yra b\u016btinas, rodo \u017emogaus prigimtis. Skirtingai nuo gyv\u016bn\u0173, \u017emogaus vaikui reikia bent 16-20 met\u0173 aktyvios pagalbos, kol jis tampa savaranki\u0161ku. Taigi aukl\u0117jimas yra pagalba vaikui, jam kuriant savo santykius su aplinka: mokantis myl\u0117ti save ir kitus. Viskas prasideda nuo t\u0117v\u0173 pavyzd\u017eio, ai\u0161ki\u0173 rib\u0173 ir taisykli\u0173, kurios b\u016btinos saugiam augimui ir brendimui. Vaikai nuolat m\u0117gina tikrinti t\u0173 rib\u0173 ir taisykli\u0173 patikimum\u0105 – lyg apsaugos darbuotojai, tikrinantys, ar \u012fjungta signalizacija.
Kaip sukurti efektyvi\u0105 signalizacijos sistem\u0105? \u0160ito meno t\u0117vai nemokomi nei universitetuose, nei kolegijose. Ta\u010diau tai nerei\u0161kia, kad negalime i\u0161mokti. Visi t\u0117vai linki savo vaikams tik gero, ta\u010diau niekas nei\u0161vengia klaid\u0173.<\/p>\n

Mes tikime J\u016bs\u0173 meile ir kvie\u010diame atleisti sau u\u017e klaidas. Kvietim\u0105 mokytis tapti brandesniais t\u0117vais priimkite ne kaip barim\u0105 ar nuvertinim\u0105, o kaip galimyb\u0119 kurti nauj\u0105 ypating\u0105 santyk\u012f su savo vaiku, kaip galimyb\u0119 pajusti ne tik did\u017eiul\u0119 buvimo t\u0117vais atsakomyb\u0119, bet ir t\u0117vyst\u0117s d\u017eiaugsm\u0105, kaip galimyb\u0119 buvim\u0105 \u0161alia savo vaik\u0173 \u012fvilkti \u012f nauj\u0105 tauri\u0105 prasm\u0119.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Lai\u0161kai (1). Kada a\u0161 tave pame\u010diau? \u201eMan g\u0117da vestis savo vaik\u0105 \u012f parduotuv\u0119: visuomet u\u017esimano to, ko a\u0161 negaliu pirkti. Kiek jis gali bandyt mano kantryb\u0119 savo kaprizais?\u201c \u201eNeturiu kantryb\u0117s \u017ei\u016br\u0117ti, kaip jis plauna indus, geriau jau i\u0161plaunu pati. Ar i\u0161au\u0161 pagaliau diena, kai jis i\u0161moks tai daryti tinkamai?\u201c \u201eApmaudu, jog dirbu nuo ryto iki […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[52],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1845","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-gyvenimas"],"yoast_head":"\nPasiklyd\u0119 pasauliai. Suraskime, supraskime vieni kitus - \u0160ilut\u0117s naujienos<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.silutesnaujienos.lt\/lt\/pasiklyde-pasauliai-suraskime-supraskime-vieni-kitus\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"lt_LT\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Pasiklyd\u0119 pasauliai. Suraskime, supraskime vieni kitus - \u0160ilut\u0117s naujienos\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Lai\u0161kai (1). Kada a\u0161 tave pame\u010diau? \u201eMan g\u0117da vestis savo vaik\u0105 \u012f parduotuv\u0119: visuomet u\u017esimano to, ko a\u0161 negaliu pirkti. Kiek jis gali bandyt mano kantryb\u0119 savo kaprizais?\u201c \u201eNeturiu kantryb\u0117s \u017ei\u016br\u0117ti, kaip jis plauna indus, geriau jau i\u0161plaunu pati. Ar i\u0161au\u0161 pagaliau diena, kai jis i\u0161moks tai daryti tinkamai?\u201c \u201eApmaudu, jog dirbu nuo ryto iki […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.silutesnaujienos.lt\/lt\/pasiklyde-pasauliai-suraskime-supraskime-vieni-kitus\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"\u0160ilut\u0117s naujienos\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/silutes.naujienos\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2013-06-02T15:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"\/\/silutesnaujienos.lt\/images\/stories\/2013\/05\/28\/thumbnails\/thumb_family-6.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"\u0160ilut\u0117s naujien\u0173 inf.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"\u0160ilut\u0117s naujien\u0173 inf.\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minut\u0117s\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.silutesnaujienos.lt\\\/lt\\\/pasiklyde-pasauliai-suraskime-supraskime-vieni-kitus\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.silutesnaujienos.lt\\\/lt\\\/pasiklyde-pasauliai-suraskime-supraskime-vieni-kitus\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"\u0160ilut\u0117s naujien\u0173 inf.\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.silutesnaujienos.lt\\\/lt\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/232f475ddd4a7b5f49b3abc788b17e83\"},\"headline\":\"Pasiklyd\u0119 pasauliai. 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